Ass and Ball cream

Ok so I have cream to smear on my ass and balls when I ride so I dont get friction, but today my longest ride I forgot to put it on and I was riding a bike too small for me.

Today I got cactus needles in my hand from a cactus pear.
I got a shave with a straight blade from an old time barber that was awesome.
I rode an extra 20 km, because of one wrong turn, so my 66 km ride ended up being 86kms, may I remind you with no ass and ball cream on.

I learned and translated anything you might want to know about olive oil. The region I am in produces more olive oil then any other in Italy and they have over 60 million trees.